After I worked for a year or a permaculture layout done on Jakkalskloof near Swellendam, directx I

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There've been major changes occurred in my life, both externally and internally. As a result, I'm going to change this site. I suddenly much more clarity about many things.
I have been for many years on a 'spiritual journey. Theoretically I was after I A Course in Miracles (AcIm) did, and sure, especially after I did it three times, a "Teacher of God. I could never get that far myself to call it. It felt so arrogant to me.
A large part of the problem was that I still had the feeling I should completely 'enlightened be before I consider myself a spiritual teacher presents. And of course it is the ego that there speak. Then what?
AcIm to me had an answer: "A good teacher clarified his own ideas and STRENGTHENS Them at teaching them." How true is not it ?! All my years of teaching and training experience testifies exactly it. And I was at that time the perfect teacher or guide? No.
I have always had a deep interest in nature and everything natural (including human behavior) had. So it was not funny to me to go a course in permaculture and thus do not start experimenting. I also increasingly wildernisstaptoere start doing.
After I worked for a year or a permaculture layout done on Jakkalskloof near Swellendam, directx I depressed again start. Again I felt permaculture is not my vocation, and I went out. I kept wildernisstaptoere do, and every now and then a talk or workshop on original play, but always thought I'd stop.
And keep wildernisstaptoere anyway. I'm a contract guide, and is only the Wilderness Leadership School not available enough full-time guides. And for a whole year they had enough guides. But it does not work where I asked for that ?!
For months I had no income. Things did not look good, but then, that's how I now live for 26 years long. It has always worked out. But yes, there is always but a little doubt ...
I met Jenny Rousell time on Jakkalskloof. We both left when things did not work out, but we have kept contact and became close friends. Jenny's directx dream to live self-sufficient was still as strong as ever. When she gets an offer to good money in Kabul (Afghanistan) to earn, she accepted. This enabled her to buy a piece of land near Knysna, and his asked me if I would join her. She would be my building a place.
At that time, my interest in permaculture again caught fire, and I was a little discouraged with the lack of action directx on the 'spiritual' front, so I could not have such an opportunity does not pass. Here would I could concentrate fully on permaculture and to your heart 'play!
So I sit here. I have been more than two months on the farm. At the beginning directx there was some problems with the developer, and I missed Swellendam, and it caught me. I got most of my time spent re A Course of Love by working.
I missed all the time in my permaculture and my wildernisstaptoere Eckhart Tolle who call presence. The permaculture and the hikes were not the problem, but my attitude towards the activities. I did not need anything else in my life to my calling to fulfill; all I needed to fully be present!
And so my last two months concentrated on absolutely to be present. Every time I was frustrated, angry, discouraged or whatever the feeling, I immediately my attention focused on the feeling. And there were quite a few such occasions. Chicken that passeth away, chickens and horses eat my plants, materials for a chicken that just do not show up, the winter will not stop and so on. Every time the "pain body popup, I am full attention.
The result is phenomenal. I actually knew. It also happened in the past. But in the past, each time I re unaware become. This time it was as if something in me suddenly ge'kliek have, and for two months I get it all right to be fairly consistently present.
I get still frustrated and discouraged and whatever. But it's directx as if there is trying to take a deep underlying peace and joy mail. It's as if the negative feelings just no longer matter so much. I can feel my identification with me pynliggaam "starting to break. And more and more often I get time